I am a dreamer. Always have been and hopefully always will be. And I'm all about big dreams being fulfilled in other people's lives. I'm so thankful for those in my life who support my passions and I want to be known as a supporter and cheerleader in the lives of others. Some of my biggest dreams at the moment include a fantastic interior design internship next summer and an internship in Kenya the following year. I want to go to Tonga and swim with the whales. I plan to skydive in the near future. Maybe I'll write a book (grandpa, please don't get too excited ;)...first I probably need to live a life worth writing about), do public speaking, or partner with an amazing ministry. I want to study abroad and hopefully start my own business someday, if I'm brave enough. If you care, I'm type 7 on the enneagram. I'm always looking to the future with my mind churning with possibilities for the next grand caper. A visionary, you could say.
Perhaps that is why I began to ache in a place deep beyond the physical pain that became the new normal for me this year. See, my freshman year of college did not go as planned. Health issues that had been slowly expanding for over a year spiraled out of control. What we believed to be the problem was found to not be the culprit, and by second semester I was left in a tangled mess of unknowns, diagnosis with an autoimmune disorder, and dead ends with every diet, medicine, doctor, and supplement we tried. Suddenly, although the pain had not changed drastically from first semester, my mindset felt more hopeless and I began to wonder if I would have to live this way forever. And that meant the death of dreams. Or at the very least, the delay of dreams.
God certainly cares about our happiness, but he cares about our holiness more
Our culture believes we can create our own happiness. If we hustle hard enough and strive long enough, we will arrive at the place where our dreams are fulfilled. We can "achieve" happiness. It's the American Dream. The land where anything is possible. The land where you "treat yo self" and pleasure is chased, sometimes at the expense of anything else. As a Christian, it's easy to believe if we follow God's will for our life, all should be smooth sailing. His plans for us are good, right? I can testify that they are, but I can also testify that things will not always be easy. God certainly cares about our happiness, but He cares about our holiness more.
5 Things To Do When Suffering Touches Your American Dream
1. Don't Be Surprised
1 Peter 4:12
Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you.
I didn't expect suffering at this time in my life. I surely thought it would come later, when I was stable and surrounded by a loving husband and compassionate kids. Not now when I'm trying to get my life off the ground and establish my place in the world. Not while at college with friends who had only known me for months. But God knows what He's doing.
2. Seek to See the Bigger Picture
This passage goes on (1 Peter 4:13) "But rejoice insofar as you share Christ's sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed." Suffering gives us an opportunity to better understand what Christ went through on the cross. It reminds us that this earth is only temporary, but our true home is in heaven. God uses it to test and refine our character and make us better on the other side. Isaiah 48:10 Job 23:10
3. Release Your Timeline
Sometimes it is not that our desire is bad, it's that our timing is wrong. One of the hardest things I had to do this year was give up a trip to Kenya. I had tentatively planned a missions trip, ending with a safari. It would truly have been amazing. The only barrier was my health. I really hoped God would heal me in time to go, and still have full faith that He could have. But He chose not to. That is hard for me to understand when it was a (seemingly) good thing that was denied, but I am among good company of those who have waited for something good. Joseph was stuck in prison for years, Abraham waited 25 years for God to fulfill His promise of a son, Joshua waited to enter the promised land, the Jews waited for their Messiah. Give God your timeline and wait for Him! He promises good to those who do. Lamentations 3: 25-26 Psalm 104:27-28
4. Break the Bonds of Entitlement and Choose Gratitude
We are not entitled to anything. If it weren't for the grace of God, we would be going to hell. So even if nothing else goes right in this life, we have enough to praise God for until He brings us home. I type this, convicted myself. It is true but so hard to believe in the midst of pain.
Have you ever noticed the uncircumstantial joy of believers living in poverty or third world countries? Perhaps they aren't living entitled to grand dreams coming true, so they find joy in the simple everyday and choose gratitude. They aren't chasing pleasure like their life depends on it. When we find our joy in Christ, we can be content even when our dreams get delayed or denied. I want to be like Paul, who penned these words, while in prison! Entitlement robs joy. But gratitude is the key to joy. It doesn't change our circumstance, but it does change how we view it. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 says we are to give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.
and finally...
5. Be Encouraged!
We serve a POWERFUL God. Nothing is too hard for Him and He is good. If you're waiting for something, maybe you just haven't seen it yet! As for my situation, God has guided me to a holistic doctor who is helping me greatly. I am not fully on the other side of this trial physically, but my dreams are looking more possible again, especially as I give it time. However, it seems I have about as many setbacks as forward steps, so when discouragement creeps in, I'm learning to lean on promises I see in Lamentations 3:31-33
"For the Lord will not cast off forever, but, though he cause grief, he will have compassion according to the abundance of his steadfast love; for he does not afflict from his heart or grieve the children of men."
He will not cast off forever. He will either change your circumstance or renew your strength if you lean on Him. He will have compassion. I also love Ephesians 3:20 "Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us."
I don't want to preach the prosperity gospel, so I'll be careful here. But the nature of trials are that, in general, they pass. Or at least become less raw with time. And for the believer, I KNOW better days are coming. If not in this life, in the next. So with hope as your anchor and gratitude as wind in your sails, keep pressing on in courage and trust! God is GOOD and He works all things together for good. Keep dreaming those big dreams, but seek holiness above happiness...I kinda think you'll find both in the process!
Thanks for stopping by as I share so much of what God's been teaching me this last year. If this encouraged you, or you know others who may be encouraged, please share this on social media or pass it along to a friend! Let me know in the comments what God's been teaching you this year :)